36 weeks and the Baby wants to come!

So I just got back from the doctor today and I am a little concerned. First of all I am only 36 weeks, plus a couple of days and the baby is still breech. I have been hoping and praying that this little one would flip around, but now a second doctor has told me that isn't much of a possibility, it seems my uterus is too small. Well I thought that was the biggest worry I had, but last Friday they found some protein in my urine and are worrying now about toxemia (of which I thought was absurd, because I have no other symptoms) but today they had me come back in and recheck the urine and I still have the protein. Not to mention that Friday when they checked me I wasn't doing a thing and now as of Tuesday I am dilated to a 2+. The doctor was not happy about that (because of the whole c-section issue) and my doctor is out of town until Friday, so he said I am on complete bed rest now. I have already been doing the bed rest thing since like 24 weeks, but it was for me and never had to do with the baby's well being, now they are worried about her. The biggest worry is the C-section and that they don't want me to go in to labor on my own. The doctor said if my blood pressure would have been high today they would have taken the baby because of the toxemia and the dilating, but he hopes we can make it at least one more week. I really don't want the baby to come this early. I know a lot people don't worry once they hit 36 weeks, but there is a reason the Lord made it 40 weeks and I would like her to develop within the womb as the Lord intended it, not in the intensive care unit as the doctor explained it.

Well I know I shouldn't worry, but I was not a huge fan of the c-section and I so wanted to have a vaginal birth and it looks like that is just not going to ever happen for me. I really think that is the hardest part for me, to know that I can never deliver a baby on my own. Don't get me wrong I will take her how ever I can get her, but there is a little bit of sadness knowing that a c-section is the only way.

Well now I get to lie in bed and pray that these contractions don't increase and that I can make it one more week at least. I can't believe how different this pregnancy has been from Ethan. I went from the easiest pregnancy in the world, to one that has definitely kept me on my toes. I feel like every time I go to the doctor they tell me a new thing I should be concerned about. Well pray that this little girl stays put a little longer and that we can make it at least until my doctor gets back from his vacation.